Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category.

Enkitec is an Anagram for Necktie

 

Screen shot 2013-10-01 at 3.08.30 PM

 

I work for a small company named Enkitec. I’ve been asked several times recently where the name Enkitec came from. In fact, someone told me just today that they had heard that “Enkitec is an anagram for necktie, which guys that work for Enkitec are universally reluctant to wear”. While that statement is true, it’s not the reason why the company was named Enkitec. Someone just happened to notice it a couple of years after the company was formed and mentioned it in a presentation. And thus the myth was born. The real story about the name was that we were trying to figure out what to call the company and we couldn’t come up with anything we liked (with a matching domain name that was still available). So we did what all marketing challenged people do, we hired a freelance marketing wiz kid to come up with some ideas for us. We met with him a few times over a couple of weeks and eventually settled on Enkitec. It means absolutely nothing by the way, but the domain name was available! :) The thing that sticks out in my memory though is that the marketing guy wore these dark rimed glasses that made him look smart. One day I made some comment about how they improved his image and said something about how if I was the suspicious type, I would think that they were just for show. He then proceeded to admit that he didn’t actually need glasses and so the lenses were just plain glass. One of my favorite all time marketing stories!

no_neckties

12c Adaptive Optimization

Since everyone seems to be all twitterpated about Oracle Database 12c this week, I thought I’d post a quick note to let you know that the slides from the presentation on 12c Adaptive Optimization I did at the Hotsos Symposium 2013 (with a lot of help from Maria) are now available in the Whitepapers / Presentations section of this blog.

While I’m on the topic, I found this little blurb in the Oracle Database 12c Release 1 New Features Guide:

Zero Effort Performance

That’s the section that talks about the Adaptive Optimization stuff. I think the documentation folks meant that they were describing performance features that didn’t require any manual intervention, but it sort of reads like the features are really easy to describe, or maybe that the writers weren’t going to work very hard on describing them. At any rate, the wording struck me as humorous. :)

New Exadata Prototype

I got a look a new prototype for the next generation Exadata last week while doing some work with a company in Europe. Apparently there is a big push to be environmentally friendly there now and so Oracle is trying to come up with a model that uses less power and is biodegradable. The word on the street is that it won’t be available until after release 2 of the 12c database.

The new model has a few drawbacks though. For one thing, it only lasts a few weeks before you must either replace it or higher some rocket surgeon consultants to come in and tune it. From the early version of the prototype I saw, it does appear to be smaller and more tasty than previous models though.

 

 

That’s a picture of the lead designer (JP) showing off the prototype. The code name for the project is “Exanana” by the way. The new model should be available in select supermarkets after lunch (err launch).  Here’s another picture of JP and one of the other designers (Paul) hamming it up for the camera.

 

 

I probably should have saved this post for April 1st!

Christmas Explain Plan Patterns

Here’s a lovely Candy Striped pattern in an Explain Plan. Looks like the traditional Christmas candy canes. Just in time for the Holiday Season!

| 156 |     FAST DUAL                                                |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 157 |      FAST DUAL                                               |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 158 |       FAST DUAL                                              |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 159 |        FAST DUAL                                             |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 160 |         FAST DUAL                                            |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 161 |          FAST DUAL                                           |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 162 |           FAST DUAL                                          |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 163 |            FAST DUAL                                         |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 164 |             FAST DUAL                                        |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 165 |              FAST DUAL                                       |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 166 |               FAST DUAL                                      |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 167 |                FAST DUAL                                     |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 168 |                 FAST DUAL                                    |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 169 |                  FAST DUAL                                   |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 170 |                   FAST DUAL                                  |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 171 |                    FAST DUAL                                 |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 172 |                     FAST DUAL                                |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 173 |                      FAST DUAL                               |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 174 |                       FAST DUAL                              |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 175 |                        FAST DUAL                             |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 176 |                         FAST DUAL                            |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 177 |                          FAST DUAL                           |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 178 |                           FAST DUAL                          |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 179 |                            FAST DUAL                         |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 180 |                             FAST DUAL                        |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 181 |                              FAST DUAL                       |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 182 |                               FAST DUAL                      |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 183 |                                FAST DUAL                     |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 184 |                                 FAST DUAL                    |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 185 |                                  FAST DUAL                   |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 186 |                                   FAST DUAL                  |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 187 |                                    FAST DUAL                 |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 188 |                                     FAST DUAL                |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 189 |                                      FAST DUAL               |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 190 |                                       FAST DUAL              |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 191 |                                        FAST DUAL             |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 192 |                                         FAST DUAL            |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 193 |                                          FAST DUAL           |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 194 |                                           FAST DUAL          |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 195 |                                            FAST DUAL         |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 196 |                                             FAST DUAL        |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 197 |                                              FAST DUAL       |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 198 |                                               FAST DUAL      |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 199 |                                                FAST DUAL     |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 200 |                                                 FAST DUAL    |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 201 |                                                  FAST DUAL   |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 202 |                                                   FAST DUAL  |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 203 |                                                    FAST DUAL |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 204 | L                                                   FAST DUA |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 205 | AL                                                   FAST DU |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 206 | UAL                                                   FAST D |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 207 | DUAL                                                   FAST  |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 208 |  DUAL                                                   FAST |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 209 | T DUAL                                                   FAS |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 210 | ST DUAL                                                   FA |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 211 | AST DUAL                                                   F |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 212 |.FAST DUAL                                                    |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 213 |. FAST DUAL                                                   |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 214 |.  FAST DUAL                                                  |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 215 |.   FAST DUAL                                                 |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 216 |.    FAST DUAL                                                |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 217 |.     FAST DUAL                                               |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 218 |.      FAST DUAL                                              |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 219 |.       FAST DUAL                                             |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 220 |.        FAST DUAL                                            |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 221 |.         FAST DUAL                                           |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 222 |.          FAST DUAL                                          |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 223 |.           FAST DUAL                                         |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 224 |.            FAST DUAL                                        |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 225 |.             FAST DUAL                                       |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 226 |.              FAST DUAL                                      |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 227 |.               FAST DUAL                                     |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 228 |.                FAST DUAL                                    |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 229 |.                 FAST DUAL                                   |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 230 |.                  FAST DUAL                                  |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 231 |.                   FAST DUAL                                 |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 232 |.                    FAST DUAL                                |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 233 |.                     FAST DUAL                               |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 234 |.                      FAST DUAL                              |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |
| 235 |.                       FAST DUAL                             |                                |     1 |       |     2   (0)| 00:00:01 |

Informative Error Messages

You have probably all experienced situations where you get an error message from Oracle and it turns out to be a total Red Herring. Occasionally though the error messages can be really helpful. I got an email from a co-worker today (thanks Stephan) that read like this:

I was working on an external table today and fat fingered something. This is the error report-

Error report:
SQL Error: ORA-30657: operation not supported on external organized table
30657.0000 – “operation not supported on external organized table”
*Cause: User attempted on operation on an external table which is
not supported.
*Action: Don’t do that!

Gotta love it. They don’t actually tell us what we did wrong, but they do tell us how to resolve the issue!

Apparently some of the Oracle developers have a sense of humor.

By the way, I’m sure you already know this but there is a nifty little Oracle provided tool called oerr that spits out this information:

 
SYS@SANDBOX1> !oerr ora 30657
30657,0000, "operation not supported on external organized table"
// *Cause:  User attempted on operation on an external table which is
//          not supported.
// *Action: Don't do that!